ABANDON HOPE OF: SATISFACTION, REFUNDS OR DEATH WITH DIGNITY
Monday, July 5, 2010
WORLD CUP PREDICTIONS
Ahem... let me say at the outset, I've had a few brewskis.
Germany v Spain
The German side is young, talented, fit, composed and single-minded. And they are exceedingly well coached. Although they dissected Australia, England and Argentina, they also lost to Serbia and scored only once against Ghana. I think four goals against their opponent in this match might be a stretch. Missing Mueller won't help; but there is a shitload of talent on the bench. This is the game that will tell me whether Neuer is the real thing. Watch out for Podolski in this match.
The Spaniards, I think, are equal to the task -- although the goal differential during the tournament might lead one to believe that Spain is fucked. (Anything can happen in a single game... and often does. I'm expecting what might be considered an upset. Although with these two teams, the word really doesn't apply.) I would like to see Cesc Fabregas in the starting lineup, sore shoulder and all. You have to start the way you wish to proceed... and a bit more creativity sure as hell wouldn't hurt. Casillas must have the game of his life.
Holland v Uruguay
The Netherlands have the easier draw... on paper. But make no mistake: Uruguay will come to play. Expect the 'kitchen sink' from these guys. The age difference between the teams isn't terribly significant. (This said by an old man leaning towards Holland.)
I haven't checked out who will be missing from the match due to accumulated cards (well, yes, Suarez will miss the game, to be sure) or injuries. This could be significant. I really should check. Ah, fuck it.
Semi-Final Predictions (And I absolutely suck at this):
Germany 2, Spain 3 (in extra time)
Netherlands 3, Uruguay 1.
2 -2 after extra time. Netherlands beats Spain on penalties.
Yeah. I'm going all in with orange.
Llewellen thinks Germany will destroy Spain (he figures Klose will get a hat-trick) and put on a clinic against the Dutch in the Final. We've got a beer riding on it.
Truthfully... I don't care what happens. I just want to watch four smashing football matches between now and Sunday.
1.1 Diners shall have the right to refuse a stomach pump. 1.2 There is no Right 1.2 2.1 Diners shall have the right, duty and obligation to pay in full. 3.1 See Right 2.1 3.2 to 5.5 These Rights have been removed by the Kitchen Staff.
DR. HUGO Z. HACKENBUSH
LUNCH COUNTER DIETICIAN
THE DINER'S BILL OF RIGHTS, Sections 5.6 to 7.4
5.6 Diners have the Right to tip generously. Neglect of this Right shall be at the expense of the Diner's desire to leave. 6.3 This is essentially a re-wording of 5.6 6.4 Diners are encouraged to use the washroom facilities, especially on All-Fibre Tuesdays. However, 'Floaters' must be removed. 7.4 Bread sticks are not a meal. And although they are provided free of charge and in abundance, there is a limit to Llewellen's tolerance.