ABANDON HOPE OF: SATISFACTION, REFUNDS OR DEATH WITH DIGNITY
Monday, February 14, 2011
CHESS CLUB NOTES
The school Chess Club tournaments are (mercifully) over. I survived, winners were declared, prizes were awarded, and not a single candidate master anywhere in the country will be in jeopardy any time soon -- or likely ever, truth to be told.
Still, they are learning the game. And a couple of kids are becoming quite good. A couple. Well, four to be exact. Which, out of a total of thirty-two children, is really not too shabby. Right?
Before each round, I gave them a pep talk. The last one ended with these words by a famous chess champion (whose name escapes me): If you see a good move, look for a better one.
A sentiment that could be applied to life in general.
1.1 Diners shall have the right to refuse a stomach pump. 1.2 There is no Right 1.2 2.1 Diners shall have the right, duty and obligation to pay in full. 3.1 See Right 2.1 3.2 to 5.5 These Rights have been removed by the Kitchen Staff.
DR. HUGO Z. HACKENBUSH
LUNCH COUNTER DIETICIAN
THE DINER'S BILL OF RIGHTS, Sections 5.6 to 7.4
5.6 Diners have the Right to tip generously. Neglect of this Right shall be at the expense of the Diner's desire to leave. 6.3 This is essentially a re-wording of 5.6 6.4 Diners are encouraged to use the washroom facilities, especially on All-Fibre Tuesdays. However, 'Floaters' must be removed. 7.4 Bread sticks are not a meal. And although they are provided free of charge and in abundance, there is a limit to Llewellen's tolerance.