Saturday, February 28, 2009

SATURDAY NIGHT CONFESSIONAL

On the way to work the other day, I told my wife that I'm beginning to forget things. Her immediate response: "Just make sure you're wearing the underwear on the inside of your pants. Everything else can be deflected."

Deflected, eh? How the hell do you deflect the fact that you momentarily forgot that the Bishops -- not the Knights -- go beside the King and Queen? Huh? Answer that one. For Christ's sake... I've been playing chess since I was six.

There have been several such instances lately. Example: Stopped at an intersection, the light turned green. In a panic, I forgot where I was or why I was there. Just for a split second. But it scared the fucking ass off me.

Tonight, my wife told me that I've probably forgotten more things than most people ever knew. She meant this as a compliment. But most people know a hell of a lot of stuff. And if I've forgotten a hell of a lot of stuff, how much is really left?

So, um, thanks for the confidence, babe.

Who are you, again?

4 comments:

unokhan said...

it helps to write down what you cannot recall. gives one a sense --or an illusion -- of control.

i hate it too

Doctorboogaloo said...

I'm becoming a walking sticky note.

Woozie said...

I've been suffering a similar fate, but I forget little shit. That's why I use my tape ball now to write notes on. Every few weeks I add a new layer so I have a clean space to write on. It also conserves tape.

Fuck, I need to call the multicultural office...

Doctorboogaloo said...

Woozie: How big is that tape ball now?
Kee-rist, if I had one it would be the size of Kilimanjaro by now.

That reminds me... I'm out of tape.